Lime-Sized News

Dear Blog,

Today a doctor put a little plastic remote control looking apparatus on my stomach and I heard a little "thump-thump-thump."

Here's the deal: babies. I've been around them all my life. My mom would announce every couple of years that I would be receiving a new little brother or sister and then it would happen. I read a book when I was 9 or 10 about the "miracle of life" and it all seemed pretty straightforward. I did my best not to think about the gory details.

But here I am. I'm married, which is already a pretty foreign concept, and now Luke and I are going to have a baby. When I heard that tiny sound, I was in awe. My jaw dropped and I looked at Luke. Before now, it was just a "+" on a pregnancy test. But it has toes now! It needs me in a more literal sense than any living thing has needed me before.

Sometime during my college years, I was going through a painful break-up and I felt lonelier than I ever have before. I just wanted to call the guy and make up and fill that void. But I knew in my heart of hearts that he wasn't the person I was supposed to marry - he wasn't the father of my children. So I started writing letters. The idea was to regain an eternal perspective and not let loneliness dictate my actions and lead me to make mistake.

"Dear Future Children," the letters would all start out, "This is your mom. I want you to know how much I love you. I can be lonely for you. I can wait."

So the moment is upon me. I'm terrified, but I've been ready all my life. Luke is the man that I was waiting for. This is the life that I've been working for. And I've never been happier.

PS: My due date is March 25th and I'm about 12 weeks along. Since some of your aren't interested in my musings and want to nitty gritty. There you go. Jerks. :)